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I Should�ve Taken That Left Turn at Albuquerque |
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Hello and welcome. If you're new here, be a dear and Read my Disclaimer. My diary not good enough for you? Fine, be that way. Try these instead: plf
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2001-02-14 - 04:24:55� So, I've been following the whole Methybeth/Uncle Bob thing, and wanted to share my two cents on the issue. While a good deal of what I'm going to say has more or less already been said by Beth, the issue has been on my mind a great deal over the past few days, so I want to sort of work through it here for myself. For those of you who don't have a clue what I'm talking about, I'll give you a brief rundown. Uncle Bob recently related a story about an incident in a restaurant when his dining experience was ruined by some very rude, ill mannered people at a nearby table. In describing these rude, ill mannered diners, he paid close attention to their body shape. He referred to the people as fat, "heifers", etc, etc. Methybeth posted an entry the next day, expressing her hurt and anger at the manner in which Uncle Bob described these people. She said that the words he used to describe the people offended her. She did not say that Uncle Bob was bad or mean. Her problem was with his choice of words. I think the issue boils down to this: Uncle Bob was taking offence with the people's poor manners and lack of consideration. He did not take offence with them because of their size. But if he didn't have a problem with their weight, why bother to bring it up at all? Especially in an insulting tone? I don't think Uncle Bob is a bad guy. He's not mean, he's not horrible. I enjoy reading his diary. See the link down below there? And having read the entry in question, I think it's obvious that Uncle Bob did not take issue with these people because they were fat. I don't think that his poor opinion of them had anything at all to do with their size. Honestly, I don't think he saw anything at all hurtful in the words he chose to describe them. But that is kind of the point, isn't it? We make jokes and comments about people's weight without really thinking about how it affects them. And we liberally use words like "fat" as an insult. How would Uncle Bob's entry have read if the women he was describing weren't described as fat? What would you have thought if he described them as a table of rude black people? Flamboyantly homosexual people? Would that have made you uncomfortable? How about this: would his entry have had the same overall effect if he described them as a table of 5 rude twig like women? Or how about if he'd picked another feature to describe them instead of body shape? How would it have read if he'd described a table of obnoxious brown haired women? It wouldn't have sounded right at all, because in out culture, and in our language, it seems natural to link up things like "fat" and "ugly" with personality deficiencies. Think about it. Have you ever called anyone a "fat bitch"? I know I have, and I even am a fat bitch, so I should know better. But my weight has nothing to do with the fact that I'm a bitch. The two words should not go hand in hand. I'd still be a bitch if I was a size 6. So why even mention the word fat? Because it adds an extra little dig, an extra little insult. I'm not saying that I am above reproach here. I, a fat girl, have used the word "fat" as an insult. But I just about want to smack myself when I hear the words come out of my mouth. I know how it feels to be on the receiving end. When we link up these concepts-- fat=bitch, fat=rude, fat=ugly, fat=deficient-- it is hurtful. It is just as hurtful as any other kind of stereotype-- black=lazy, black=criminal-- it's unfair, it's untrue, it takes away a person's individuality, and it gives them identity based on one single aspect of their entire being. I think what we, as individuals, need to do is just stop and think about the words that come out of our mouths. Like really, and truly think about the meaning behind what we are saying to each other, and about each other. Think about the words you choose, and why you choose them. Okay, stepping off the soapbox now. Tomorrow's entry will be more of the silly drivel that you've come to expect here, I promise.
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The big 3 0 - 2006-06-03 Hello again - 2006-05-03 Random stuff in place of an actual update - 2006-03-15 Pictures. Just Because. - 2006-02-23 Christmas 05 - 2005-12-26 Currently listening to: |
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